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Matthew Gaffen on: His Standards

Gaffen's Sister on: His Masculinity

This is a picture that was made by a friend of Gaffen's little sister, inspired by a conversation they had about Gaffen's masculine prowess. I quote Gaffen's little sister as saying: "lol, my brother couldn't hurt a fly." Well ladies, he may not have the most impressive physical frame and may not be the alpha male of the pack, but what he lacks in muscles he makes up for in intelligence and depth.

Matthew Gaffen on: Online Dating

Introducing Mr. Matthew Gaffen

Matthew Gaffen: Circa 2007

Matthew Gaffen is an enigma to most. In the four years that I have known him, he has always remained very much behind the scenes, whether it be helping others with work for little to no public acknowledgement, or pulling strings from his command center at student sit ins, this boy tries his hand at many things. Of course this begs the question as to why such a seemingly proactive and interesting person has had such little luck with ladies, and struggles to hold down a job to pay the rent.

In this blog we aim to investigate and document Gaffen’s life, his past experiences, his day-to-day habits and routines, his fashion sense, or perceived lack of, his interests, his work, and his social life. Every part of what makes Matthew Gaffen, Matthew Gaffen will be subject to our unique critique. Some would class our style as an outright pisstake, but I prefer to see it as lovingly highlighting Gaffen’s foibles, celebrating in his misfortune.

Finally, and I’m sure Gaffen would argue more importantly, this blog was created by some of his close friends in order to get him back in the saddle and into the nearest, easiest, fattest slag that we can get for less than a few drinks. Please do not hesitate to contact us if you think you can be of any assistance, God knows after 792 days without getting any we need all the help we can get to complete this epic quest. Enjoy!